Closed Doors [Open in spite of Thread Name]

[notworthless]

Who: Callie, People who might find her.
What: Third Cohort's resident angry teen is being even less social.
When: Late Afternoon
Where: Amphitheater
Why: She takes (perceived) rejection very well.

Callie, if you can believe it, has been even less social now that she's been demoted. Any direct conversations she did her best to end quickly, she was... polite, but it was clearly forced. She'd also started varying her locations to hide out from other people. Part of it was the thought of getting out of here kept gnawing at the back of her mind, part of it was just avoiding the choice. The choice she didn't want to face.

Right now she was doing a paper map from her camera, marking out the places she's been. Something to keep her mind off things, she needed to do it anyway. A 'coverage map' she could show Dean would help them work out whatever favor she owes him, even if it isn't getting his car. But if they find a way around the magics of Trivia's children, she wanted to be ready. It hurt to even consider being trapped here by an 'ally.' When they were trapped due to the siege, that was one thing. But the Greeks who made it clear how much they owed for such hospitality now had this as a prison. How would they find the Red Room without sending out parties, how would they hunt down any information from within a barrier so tight it was meant to contain all manner of transit?

And with the walls tightening, all she really wanted was to find a space to be in peace, which was becoming more complicated with so many people and so few places to go. At least, for the moment, nobody seemed to keen on a talent show, or singing, so the theater seemed more than empty. And anyone who sought her out would look in the woods, Nike's cabin, or behind Cabin two.

She should be safe here for a little while, for whatever passed as safe anymore...

Comments

[notworthless]

She hadn't figured on an actual answer, "Most of those things are why I'm in trouble in the first place. My concern for the legion here is why I distrust the other groups, I'm hardly stronger than half the camp, if I didn't speak my mind and speak it directly nothing would have come up. I'd be just like everyone else enjoying all this... freedom, until they snuffed that too."

She figured the lockdown would ruffle more feathers, that more people would be outraged that instead of being put to use they were waiting for a sign, or an oracle, or some good luck to just answer their prayers. Do the Graecus just expect their parents to answer this for them? "What strength I have comes from everything else, and everything else is a part of me. And Lupa, or Mr. D, or Chiron wants me to give up that part of me for what? Because some flower child didn't like my tone, I disliked a cabin that barely stands, and I ditched a Faun in Philadelphia? Now that same Graecus, and a bunch of other campers are so lost in Cupid's festival wasting time."

"The only reason I'm here is that I'm not gifted at Trivia's powers, otherwise I'd be doing the only thing I'm good at. Legion work."

[rainfelled]

"The duty of the fauns here is to help protect the campers. Of course he would be upset by that and report it, especially when Gaea is targeting demigods. The son of Cer--Demeter most likely thought that you had used a racial slur. Cupid's festival is their way of regaining their morale and lifting the spirits of the other campers while their leaders plan on what must be done to regain what's been stolen. Even the Legion would have done that."

Aqua could agree with Callie on disliking the restriction of their freedom, especially since this Camp was smaller than the Roman one. Still, she did understand why it had to be put in place.

"You could always ask about their culture, why they do the things they do, instead of assuming. There has to be at least one Greek you can trust. Then find an Egyptian and a Norse you can trust. They're only asking for respect, and at least a modicum of the same trust you give to the Legion. The moment you feel like you can do that, Callie, will be the moment that I, as Centurion, vouch for you."

[notworthless]

"Protecting the campers at the cost of everyone beyond these walls. If given the opportunity I would happily give up this safety to see if there are any other legionnaires trapped out there, in need of us," Callie retorted, all these rules, all the restrictions. If they were to protect the safety of demigods they were already wrong. There are still demigods outside the camp, and the camp couldn't support more people. Not the way it is. "And the son of Demeter declared me 'holier than thou' based on the fact I find speaking through rainbows weird and that I did not find this camp my home. He's an idiot, and given his big focus on celebrating Cupid and Aphrodite instead of wanting to recover what is lost, he is better off here far from combat."

Trying to defend the thoughts and opinions of that Graecus ass wouldn't work. And everyone flocked to him like his touch was gold. His position on things were what was wrong.

"And he's also why I don't need to learn about their culture. This is a camp, not a city. They are children, not an army. They think that playing capture the flag makes them soldiers, and that being away from their family is a sacrifice!" There are tears in her eyes as she gets dangerously close to what the real meaning of sacrifice is. The real distinction between what she has lost and what he has given up, "The Greeks I do talk to, the ones that aren't assholes, are few and far between. And no amount of understanding why they do things will change that this isn't a city, this is a summer camp. And to fight Gaea and her Red Room, we would be acting, not waiting for permission from their leaders."

"And if you can't see the problem with this, I don't want you to vouch for me."

[rainfelled]

Aqua waited patiently for Callie to finish. If she'd expected her Centurion to give up or get angry, then she was going to be very disappointed. If anything, it made Aqua more determined to get to the heart of the matter.

"Then what does 'sacrifice' mean, Callie? Tell me, what does it mean for you?"

She wanted to understand, or maybe even needed to.

[notworthless]

"Sacrifice is not telling Jude what I am, where I am, and having him hate me for leaving him behind. Cause if he knew about Trivia's blood he'd become a target to monsters." Callie started, eyes still gleaming with where her heart was, "It was five years of taking crap from people using me and my brother for a cheap paycheck. Making sure that everyone hated me more than him, so I got beat up. It's doing whatever it takes so that the legion survives, so that I don't have to carry anymore dying children from a burning school. Even die, just to make sure someone else doesn't have to be me."

"And apparently this makes me selfish, that it's all about me. That I feel I'm better than everyone." Her eyes are burning and she's trying not to cry. She mumbles her next words. "Anyone that thinks I'm better than them must be the lowest form of crap on this earth..."

[rainfelled]

She was quiet as she listened. It hurt to see Callie in so much pain, but at the same time she couldn't help a feeling of admiration to Callie's conviction. She wanted to reach out and hug her, but she knew she shouldn't. She knew Callie wouldn't appreciate that without permission, and so Aqua refrained from doing so.

"Callie, that took a lot of courage and love to do what you had to do. I wish you didn't have to do any of those things and go through all that pain. But...instead of being someone he hates, why not be someone Jude can be proud of?"

[notworthless]

"By lying? He can't know what I am, so he can't know what I do. Plus I abandoned him two years ago. He's happy now, he has a family... putting him in danger and relocating him somewhere safe? Like this prison. Then I really would be selfish, and everything Dave thinks about me would be true."

Callie made a choice, her or Jude. His happiness for her's, it wasn't a trade she'd make. He could have a good, happy life. One with a family that cares, really cares. Not just... using him for a paycheck, or as unpaid cleaning. Crap, she was crying wasn't she?

"It didn't take any courage, I wasn't scared."

[rainfelled]

"Courage doesn't mean facing a fear. It can be part of what makes someone courageous, but it's not all that it is. You did what was needed to protect your brother, and then faced the consequences of those decisions."

Aqua made as if to reach out, but she stopped and took her hand back.

"Now that Jude's happy, why can't you let yourself be happy? Just because you had to lose something doesn't mean that you can't gain another thing."

[notworthless]

"In this prison? The only thing that works for me is legion work. Quests, being useful. I'm not even a full legionnaire anymore. And if I could call this place home, what then? It'll just make sure this place burns just like New Rome. And thanks to the stupid barriers I won't be able to save anyone!"

Callie turned away to try to salvage some of her dignity. She didn't know how to let people in, she didn't remember. Some people just... understood, not through words, or sharing, or feelings but... they knew. She didn't even realize all her walls until she was faced with the idea of getting passed them.

[rainfelled]

"Then don't make a place your home. Make other people your home. Ven did."

She shook her head. She was hoping maybe some of this was getting through, but she wouldn't know for sure.

[notworthless]

Callie knew her initial response to the idea, 'so I can watch them die?' but kept that to herself. Not very helpful, to always assume the worst. But someone has to.

"We're in a war right now, nobody is safe no matter how many barriers this place has. I don't want anyone to become me, that includes making them in my death."